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Notice to all users of the Holodeck:

There are safety protocols in place that cannot be deactivated without the approval of two commanding officers or the captain to protect users of the Holodeck from potential harm. However, every time the Holodeck is ever used in a nontrivial manner, no matter what the safety protocols say, the Holodeck turns into a deathtrap.

Unless you believe yourself to be adept at constructing a forcefield from your communicator and 19th century Earth tools, or you're at the very least not wearing a red shirt, you are strongly advised not to attempt to use the Holodeck until a designer comes up with a safety protocol that doesn't kill you whenever somebody looks at it funny. Even when you're not on the holodeck. Or in the same quadrant. Or time period.

In fact, if you are wearing a red shirt, Starfleet may not be the job for you

Ed
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Why don't humans have such fatal errors?

Permalink 01/25/07 at 08:16:49 pm, by Ed, 386 words   English (US)
Categories: Programming

When I boot my computer, shut down my video card capper, and run a certain program, Windows Blue-Screens, and I have to reinstall my mouse and keyboard drivers (Bluetooth). Whenever I run Adobe Photoshop CS, and I click on the splash screen at startup, the program has a fatal error and "must be stopped". When I hook up my old keyboard (to reinstall my new keyboard's drivers) and press the left Windows key, the My Computer icon on my desktop gets renamed 52=-, my current window closes, and Windows Help takes its place. When I try to install Ubuntu Linux 6.10 with my hardware configuration, I can't even boot into the installer unless I take out my graphics card, and when I do try to install it, it stops at 95% every time, thus requiring me to boot into Administrative mode on Windows to fix the Master Boot Record so it doesn't try to boot into a corrupted installation of Linux every time I turn the computer on. If I want to burn a CD, I'd better be sure my RAM is fast enough, otherwise I'll be going through a lot of wasted CDs.

When I stub my toe, you know what happens? It hurts. When I am about to be late for class, you know what happens? I run faster. I adapt. And do you know what happens when I get sick? (My keyboard just crashed) I lay in bed, and I take medicine, and I feel better in the morning. There are no popups, I never have to shut down after reinstalling new software or drivers, and I don't need to take Norton to get rid of that nasty flu. I never bluescreen at all. If I'm writing a paper and my hand is moving too fast and my head can't keep up, I don't have to throw the paper away and start over. My body takes care of itself. Whenever anything bad happens, it adapts to the situation and keeps going. My computer? Not so much. I wish computers would fail gracefully much more often, like this game I was recently playing.

And I would never, ever have to rewrite my entire blog post just because I my hand was pointed at the wrong thing at the wrong time, causing my internet browser to crash.

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