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Ed
« Job Title: Install LackeyThe wizardry of computer science... literally »

Strawberry Shortcake of Doom

Permalink 07/14/07 at 11:40:24 pm, by Ed, 232 words   English (US)
Categories: General

Recipe: Strawberry Shortcake of Doom

  • 3 pints fresh strawberries
  • 1/2 cup white sugar
  • 2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
  • 4 teaspoons baking powder
  • 2 tablespoons white sugar
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • 1/3 cup shortening
  • 1 egg
  • 2/3 cup milk
  • 5 oz gold
  • 1 evil overlord
  • 2 cups whipped heavy cream

DIRECTIONS

  1. Slice the strawberries and toss them with 1/2 cup of white sugar. Set aside.
  2. Preheat oven to 425 degrees F (220 degrees C). Preheat crucible to 2000 degrees F (1050 degrees C). Grease and flour one 8 inch round cake pan.
  3. In a medium bowl combine the flour, baking powder, 2 tablespoons white sugar and the salt. With a pastry blender cut in the shortening until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Make a well in the center and add the beaten egg and milk. Stir until just combined.
  4. Place the gold into a separate container. Smelt at 2000 degrees F (1050 degrees C). When fully liquid, pour 7/8 of the evil overlord's power, life-force, and will into the mixture. Let cool partially before pouring into the prepared pan to avoid shattering.
  5. Spread the batter into the pan. Bake at 425 degrees F (220 degrees C) for 15 to 20 minutes or until the rest of the cake is also gold (in color only). Let cool partially in pan on wire rack. Ignore death threats from evil overlord.
  6. Slice partially cooled cake in half, making two layers. Place half of the strawberries on one layer and top with the other layer. Top with remaining strawberries and cover with the whipped cream.

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