Oh, I got hot sause all over my bazito!

You know what this is? It's a brain sucker. You know what it's doing? Filing its tax return

If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent apple pie

The Adventures of Little Ed Brave

Tell airport security your name is McCannister because you can hide anything in a cannister.

You know what? Nobody notices when this changes anyway.

There are 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and STFU

What happens in a black hole stays in a black hole

The black hole draws you inexorably inward. Time slows. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.

I'd diddle little umdidlie... if she weren't my half-sister.

Abortion prevents pedophilia. In more ways than one!
Get Firefox!
I wrote a haiku

which I was about to share,

but then I thought, "screw it."
Level 1

Notice to all users of the Holodeck:

There are safety protocols in place that cannot be deactivated without the approval of two commanding officers or the captain to protect users of the Holodeck from potential harm. However, every time the Holodeck is ever used in a nontrivial manner, no matter what the safety protocols say, the Holodeck turns into a deathtrap.

Unless you believe yourself to be adept at constructing a forcefield from your communicator and 19th century Earth tools, or you're at the very least not wearing a red shirt, you are strongly advised not to attempt to use the Holodeck until a designer comes up with a safety protocol that doesn't kill you whenever somebody looks at it funny. Even when you're not on the holodeck. Or in the same quadrant. Or time period.

In fact, if you are wearing a red shirt, Starfleet may not be the job for you

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Happy Life Day!

Permalink 12/23/08 at 06:54:50 am, by Ed, 165 words   English (US)
Categories: Work, Dreams of a phenytoin addict

Today is my last day of work before my Life Day* break. I get a 12-day weekend before I go back, which is not too shabby. Finally, some time to play with my Wii. Oh, yeah. I have a Wii. Also, my company gave me an iPod Touch for Life Day, which is pretty nifty. Who needs a cash bonus when you get a free fricken' iPod Touch!?

Some day I'll get to posting about some of my strange dreams recently again. I remember there was a lion, a transvestite, and more being in high school. You'd think those dreams would go away after not being in school for awhile, but you'd be wrong (I am referring, of course, to the transvestite dreams. I knew a lot of gay people in school).

* - I know, Life Day was originally a harvest festival rather than a solstice festival, but it's grown that way, and everybody thinks it is anyway, and there's no closer Star Wars holiday.

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