Oh, I got hot sause all over my bazito!

You know what this is? It's a brain sucker. You know what it's doing? Filing its tax return

If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent apple pie

The Adventures of Little Ed Brave

Tell airport security your name is McCannister because you can hide anything in a cannister.

You know what? Nobody notices when this changes anyway.

There are 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and STFU

What happens in a black hole stays in a black hole

The black hole draws you inexorably inward. Time slows. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.

I'd diddle little umdidlie... if she weren't my half-sister.

Abortion prevents pedophilia. In more ways than one!
Get Firefox!
I wrote a haiku

which I was about to share,

but then I thought, "screw it."
Level 1

Notice to all users of the Holodeck:

There are safety protocols in place that cannot be deactivated without the approval of two commanding officers or the captain to protect users of the Holodeck from potential harm. However, every time the Holodeck is ever used in a nontrivial manner, no matter what the safety protocols say, the Holodeck turns into a deathtrap.

Unless you believe yourself to be adept at constructing a forcefield from your communicator and 19th century Earth tools, or you're at the very least not wearing a red shirt, you are strongly advised not to attempt to use the Holodeck until a designer comes up with a safety protocol that doesn't kill you whenever somebody looks at it funny. Even when you're not on the holodeck. Or in the same quadrant. Or time period.

In fact, if you are wearing a red shirt, Starfleet may not be the job for you

Ed

Categories: General, Games, Programming, School, Work

Pages: << 1 ... 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 ... 52 >>

Whether you care or not

Permalink 11/11/09 at 07:08:57 am, by Ed, 105 words   English (US)
Categories: General

You know what I hate about the opera? It's not that it's terribly high squealing soprano vibrato in another language for three hours, it's... oh, wait, it is that. But what else it is is the reason you go.

Like opera or not, that's not why you go. You go because you are supposed to like it, regardless of whether you actually do.

It makes no sense to me: If you're watching something on TV, and you don't like it, you change the channel or shut off the TV, but you can plan months in advance to go see something they don't actually want to.

You'll get... some money!

Permalink 11/10/09 at 06:44:37 am, by Ed, 189 words   English (US)
Categories: General

Along with my electricity bill came this pamphlet titled, "Decisions Decisions". Somewhat of a vague description for a pamphlet, and my electric company has no business even thinking about 96% of the things that title could cover.

But when you got to the inside, it's specifically about energy efficiency improvements around the home. Specifically, ones they are willing to provide for the low, low price of blah, blah, blah.

But you I can Take Action! If I'm ready to make multiple improvements, I can Sign Up For The Home Performance With ENERGY STAR Program.

And do you know what I'll get if I complete five or more improvements (three required, and at least two optional)? Well, let me tell you:

Up to $640 or more in rebates!

That's right, up to, or more than, $640. Sorta covers the whole range, doesn't it? Really, what they're saying is:

$0 or more in rebates!

Which I will admit does not sound so enticing. But when I can get at most $640 or more, that doesn't really convince me that you're going to give me anything useful.

So, decisions, decisions. I think I'll take the "or more".

Edology

Permalink 10/29/09 at 06:13:54 am, by Ed, 159 words   English (US)
Categories: General

The great thing about Latin is you can make up words based on real words so easily and they already have meanings:

Real word: Computation - Calculating a result
New word: Computology - The study of calculating a result

Affiliation - To be connected to (a person or corporation)
Affiliology - The study of connections between peoples and corporations

Asphyxiation - Being choked
Asphyxiology - The study of being choked

PlayStation - One of the first 3D gaming consoles
PlayStology - The study of one of the first 3D gaming consoles

Gas Station - A place to fill up your gas tank
Gas Stology - The study of places to fill up your tank

Mention - To state a fact or opinion
Menology - Do dooo do do do.
Menology - Do do do... do.
Menology - Do doooo do do do. Do do do. Do do do do do do... dooo do do... do.

Limbofemenist

Permalink 10/15/09 at 06:53:30 am, by Ed, 151 words   English (US)
Categories: General, Media

I am not a feminist, nor am I an anti-feminist. I fall in that annoying middle-ground where neither side likes me. I do not believe anything about women, I only know a few things. For example, women give birth to babies. Men do not have that capability.

There are also some other... anatomical differences in women. Sometimes, if the anatomical differences are rather large, they can be distracting to men. "How big?" you ask. Well, I usually go with the Double C rule:

Centaurs and Cyclopses.

I mean, imagine walking in to work one day, going over to the water cooler, only to find a cyclops guarding it. Wouldn't that be distracting to you?

There are other examples as well, of course. Namely, fins, tentacles, hunchbacks, gold bikinis, guns pointed at your face, and having huge fans that can slit your throat.

I will admit... not all of these are anatomical.

Advanced Code Signing FTW; Also Apple Sucks

Permalink 09/25/09 at 08:20:58 pm, by Ed, 501 words   English (US)
Categories: Work, Programming

This may not be pertinent to anybody who reads this, but it seems like something I need to share, so that the other two people on the planet who are in similar situations may come across this answer.

Here's the premise:

The binary you uploaded was invalid. The signature was invalid, or it was not signed with an Apple submission certificate

Now, if you're an iPhone developer, you know what this means. It means Apple sucks at getting their shit together. 99% of the time, you've followed the instructions, but the instructions were wanting, and we only wish the error messages were just as bad, but they are essentially non-existent.

There are about a hundred and one ways to get that error message, but apparently nobody else has experienced my particular method yet. After going through several options, I eventually used the application update utility, which gave me a slightly more useful message:

Application failed codesign verification. Please see the console log for additional details

Essentially saying the same thing in different words, but huzzah, we can have somewhere to look for additional details!

After five minutes of finding the console log, I found this gem:

ApplicationLoader[800654]: A sealed resource is missing or invalid

And from there I found out about the codesign utility, which can actually give me a real answer! So, I run the codesign verifier on the app:

codesign -vv helloworld.app
helloworld.app valid on disk

When you upload to the app store, you have to zip your app. I unzipped the file I was uploading and tried it there, and that's the breakthrough I got:

codesign -vv helloworld_unzipped.app
helloworld_unzipped.app /Users/mac1/helloworld_unzipped.app/._order.plist sealed resource is missing

Ahah! Finally, a real filename! But... wait. I don't even have that file in my project! Why is it looking for it? And what's more, why does it say it's fine at first, then I zip it and then unzip it and it's broken!?

Well! I included a certain directory and all of its contents because I want the app to automatically include any new files without changing the project. There was apparently this hidden file in there as well, ._order.plist, which I wasn't even using in the project, and wasn't used anywhere at all, in fact. And also, XCode, Apple's Objective-C IDE, included it as a resource for the project. And also, that particular file is not included when zipping up directories. And also, then unzipping it and doing a diff on the two directories gives no difference, because it ignores hidden files by default. And also, there's a hash of the exact contents of each file and if one of those files is not extant or doesn't have the correct hash, then it's suddenly an invalid application.

So, this all adds up to about 8 hours of work to delete a single file and recompile the application, and suddenly it works!

And that's why I didn't get much work done today.

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